Listening to: Portugal – Walk the Moon, from their album TALKING IS HARD



So…this title is a little cryptic…but we are going to discuss how spirits communicate, and a little bit of my experience with trying to control and decipher messages.

Historically, I have had some MONSTER problems with reclaiming my body from spirit. I HAVE BEEN POSSESSED AGAINST MY WILL…SEVERAL TIMES. This is actually something that I struggled with most of my life. So here is some back story…

When beginning to explore our gifts, Carmen and I wanted to invoke all the latent and distant parts of ourselves. We wanted to experience our full capacity, good, bad….and UGLY. We thought…whatever happens, we will be able to handle it. After all, we are both, at the core, very loving and caring people <3. (While we aspire to this end, we have moments…) So here we go on our wonderful journey…to invoke parts of ourselves that are latent and very dark. So along with our friend Cha Cha, we found the four sisters we once were before this life, before the beginning of earth. Sounds like a crock of bs..but your spirit is old too, and it branches to the beginning of time, and you can still feel its echo if you chose to listen.

While this experience was very enlightening, teaching us of our connections to one another, and showing us the literal “Darkness” inside all of us…it came with a boon..and a heavy burden.

While Carmen experienced repressed memories coming to light, I experienced the echo of myself taking over my life and repressing my memory in medias res. We would sit at the table and channel our higher selves, re –live conversations, and take records.

Needless to say, we didn’t really think that we could be possessed by ourselves, and I was the unsuspected victim of a full on possession of a detached old part of my spirit that remained latent and dormant in my young years, but slowly emerged until it was abruptly called forth.

After taking care of that issue, which is another story entirely, I realized the importance of protecting myself from being taken over. I began to employ self checks and balances.

I am a psychic for a living, so there are times when I have to block out messages to get through mundane tasks. I do the regular ground and shield etc. but I am apparently, a sought after medium. I used to let anyone and anything walk up inside of me and talk, say goodbye and think that was that. However, I caution ALL MEDIUMS/PSYCHICS/AND EMPATHS!!! You have no idea what you are really doing…so let me break it down for you…

After having these problems, and after my possession, I have taken great care to define myself, create checks and balances, and make sure I am me when I speak. I want every wave I put into the universe to be of my spirits creation. After all, I incarnated for MY PURPOSE. Not to let every Tom/Dick/Harry spirit or entity step in and say a few words. If they want to do that, they can go ahead and get their behind down here and do something about it!!!

To be clear…this happens in my DAILY LIFE!!! When I am trying to HUMAN, and be disconnected from spiritual problems. Unfortunately, it is naïve to think that you are EVER ALONE, EVER COMPLETELY UNAFFECTED, AND EVER WITHOUT A PRESCENCE AROUND YOU.

So, the first order of business when I started my journey to healing and gaining control of my abilities and over the messages I allow was having a conversation with my guides which went like this.

“Hey guys…I don’t want to hear about anything that isn’t important. If it is not going to affect me, someone I love, doesn’t serve a purpose toward growth and unity, or higher understanding, then don’t let me hear it.”

The other part to that…

“No one gets to channel or come into my aura unless you let them in.”

So…I had an intention with that…knowing previously this information:

  • When I channel, I see spirits as stepping into my body from behind.
  • The cords that connect me to my spirit are like projector to my conciouness that reflect my higher consciousness into my mind.
  • When I channel, I allow someone to come between my higher self, and project into my subconscious through those same projected waves of ‘energy’ or ‘conciousness’.
  • My self will always shine through more brightly than other spirits.
  • The degree to which I feel a message depends on how strongly that spirit can create a change in the projection of myself.
  • How I know a spirit is trying to communicate is because I feel like I am not myself.

Well…my guides stopped letting spirits come through from behind…


It is my theory that different types of empaths/mediums use a different channel, or subconscious receptor to receive messages.

What happens when you seek spirit, and you cut off one way of communication? Well…they find another way in!!! If you seek spirit, you will find it.

So…im over here thinking…this is nice. I have more control!!! I have peace and quiet!!! I have more clarity!!! Thank GOD!!! Thank GODDESS!!! Thank EVERYTHING!!! LORD JESUS!!! PRAISE THIS AMAZING REVELATION!!!

Well, all in good time, this peace and quiet became a storm of new experience.

When I started to control one gate, the gate I associate with my ability, I realized just how opened you can be by closing a door.

I was exorcised July 2014. I experienced low energy, and a lot of residual attachments, did a lot of self-guidance and self-defining and reached a good stable function in October 2014.

Things were great, and going normal for me until January 2015 when I had my first ever physical empathic episode. I had never experienced someone’s physical pain, and I could not speak, only garble and ramble and try to rationalize my sudden and awkward pain.

At first I thought that this episode was to help a friend, who at the time, I did not know had these experiences, but again in February 2015, while visiting New Orleans for Mardi Gras, I had crippling pain and panic episodes. Im usually that person who is like…”Yeah tradgedy happens, spirits will just tell me stories, not emotionally terrifying or hard for me to go there…it’s whaterver.” Well, I had several of these episodes. I experienced blackouts and said things like “Im paralyzed”, “My back is broken”, “Where is my head”, and all other manner of cryptic things while Carmen tried to find Chinese food and force feed me, as I had not noticed my serious lack of eating while in New Orleans. Just didn’t feel hungry. I was in SO MUCH PAIN!!!! I really wanted to die at one point.

Needless to say, now I understood why people might not want to go visit places with so much residual energy…esoecially when they cannot control how they feel.

My conclusions from this experience came through lots of long conversations with a friend of mine….

  • Spirits use the body as the medium to communicate.
  • Slight manipulations of electric signals? Picking up on changes?
  • This communication happens on a small scale, and through subconcious channels.
  • We tap into this awareness through identifying self vs. non-self, watching changes in patterns, and observing what is being said, by determining what thoughs are ours and not ours.
  • I reported before feelings “emotions” and “seeing visions” as my main methods of communication, as well as “uncanny gut feelings/intuitions”.
    1. Emotions and Visual Cues are processed in the BACK OF THE HEAD. Where I reported pain and tension when I needed to relay a message.
  • Where do pain signals first process in the brain?
    1. The brain stem!!!
  • The brain stem is something you really can’t control at all.
  • Hmmm…

(Keep in mind this is some ROUGH theory that I am still exploring…)

So to me, well, if I was going to ignore messages, now we have spirits who want me to share, overwhelming me because I’m ignoring them, by using a part of my physiology that I cannot control. The most primal and ancient part of our brains.

So I made a new pact with my spirit guides…

“Don’t let any pain through unless I specifically ASK to feel the pain of another person to help them heal.”

Well, now that we have those two fronts under control…I am thinking…cool, got it.

And then….the next wave ensues.

Now in the begging of March, the messages are coming right in front of my face!!! But only between people.

So, as I am looking at myself in the mirror or trying to talk to others, here come the spirits in between now using my ACTUAL eyes to show themselves, and stand between me and others. Its like they want the attention on them!!! And how can you ignore them???

As I said before, most of my messages occurred before in my mind’s eye through “visions” and “emotions” and just intuitive feelings. I would let the spirit project an image into my mind. I thought that this was invasive, but I have learned there is a BIG difference between spirits that are respectful of my space and my guides, and those whom are not.

Of course we know this, BUT that is the issue. Some spirits around me are NOT being respectful, and they need to be confronted instead of ignored.

Be warned…they WILL find another way. So DO NOT ignore them, take a moment to have a conversation and come to an understanding.

This experience has taught me that you cannot shut down spiritual communication completely as an empathy or psychic. Once you are in tune, you will always be. It is not healthy to be avoidant, and while that was not m direct intention, it was my action.

If you are having experiences that you cannot control, or feel that you are uncomfortable, make sure that you call on your guides, higher power, friends/family, or another person who has the same experiences as you, to help you get to the bottom of the issue. Sometimes, we don’t have what it takes to get the message through, but it is just a matter of someone who needs acknowledgement. Unfortunately, not all spirits care about your wellbeing, and even with the strongest guides, they will find a way around. If you know that something needs to be faced and dealt with, make sure that you find the way to do it. Don’t be alone and afraid!!! Have a conversation, and work it out.


Hopefully soon I will have some more solid explanations about my experiences that will help others to have them. I did not personally thing my gifts or skills would branch into other forms so strongly, but they did when I ignored mine. I learned the lesson that avoidance is not the issue, but do your best to accept and understand that you have a gift and it is your responsibility to figure out how to use it. For your mental health and balance, and for the health and balance of others through you.

I am still working on my balance. I am happier than ever to have a system that is working for me, but it has come with a lifetime of practice to be honest, only five or six years of pulling myself into a calculated and speculative awareness. Don’t be afraid of spiritual interaction, but find the safest and most comfortable way for you.

At this point, I wonder how people can ignore messages, cause baby…THE COME FROM ALL SIDES…until you GET THE MESSAGE!!!


  1. Reblogged this on EccentriKat and commented:
    So informative! I have been fortunate to attend a couple seminars by Curtis and Carmen. They are both amazing and intelligent and so helpful! Every time I see them I am drawn to them. I don’t easily talk to people I don’t know but I could instantly sense openness and acceptance from them.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thank you so much ❤ Im glad this has helped you. Again, it's just my opinion and experience in it's most honest retelling. We are all exploring and growing. Your feedback is very much appreciated!!!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s